Map-Making and Map Reading

18 Jun

Dear friend,

I decided to start this blog so I could write. And I mean, really write.

Not that I was ever very good at it. But I suppose this skill has since been rusting with unuse. Especially since I never really have the opportunity to write about anything interesting anyway. I also feel my real self is getting less and less interesting with unuse. There are so many things you lose when you decide to withhold the truth for propriety’s sake. In time, you do become that projection – weightless and hazy.

I am tired of life, and have been for quite awhile. It pains me to admit this selfish thought. Everyone has their cross to carry. But I am tired of life. And there’s no hiding it.

Took me awhile to think of a title for this blog, and then I spied Kerouac on the shelf and decided this will be a journey – an inward one. A search for the self that I’ve lost. What I’ve lost by working too hard, by keeping my eye on the wrong prize, by insulating myself from life’s vulnerabilities, by hardening my heart to other, more important things in life.

I am hopeful that this is a journey I will survive – not only survive, but flourish because of it. And thus I proceed to map out my way, with its steady driving plains, peaks and pitfalls for retrospection, introspection.

And so I begin on my way. Thanks for coming with me.

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